You Are Their Whole World

“To the world you may be one person; but to one person you may be the world.” Dr Seuss

Role Model Blog

The most important person in the life of a child is the person who spends the most time with them.  It is their mother, father, brother, sister, aunt, uncle, grandma, grandpa, koro, nanny, or caregiver. It is the person who wakes them in the morning for school, and tucks them into bed at night.  It’s the person who gets up at 3am to a nightmare or tummy ache, and calls in sick to work because their child needs them.  It is that person who reads them endless ‘Thomas The Tank Engine’ Stories and acts if the rainbow they just drew is the Mona Lisa! 

Never underestimate the power you have over the health and well-being of your child.  

They chose you because there  was something in you that could give them what they needed in this lifetime. They are here to learn from you, and you are here to learn from them.  You are both connected on a soul level, and nothing in the world runs deeper than that. 

Children learn from us everyday.  They learn how valuable they are, and not just from how we treat them, but by how we treat ourselves.  

So how do you treat yourself?

Are you kind and gentle on yourself, or are you hard on yourself?  Do you speak your truth or keep it bottled up inside so you don’t upset anyone?  Do you take time for yourself to do the things you love or do you sacrifice your sanity to fill the needs of others?  Do you speak to yourself with love or call yourself names? 

Whatever it is you think about yourself, or don’t think, is forming the belief systems of your child.  They are learning how to treat themselves and how others should treat them by the way you treat yourself, and allow others to treat you. 

That’s huge right? The power we have over the way our child views themselves should be handled with care.  When we as mothers go without so much all the time, so that we can give our children everything, we are teaching them that they must sacrifice everything for those they love.  

So what is the most effective way to raise the self-esteem of our children? We must raise the self-esteem of ourselves as parents before we can even begin to raise the self-esteem of our children. We must rise up, overcome our fears, our negative self-beliefs and start to feel good about ourselves.

Why does that feel uncomfortable? Because it’s easier as parents, or guardians to do something for our children than it is for ourselves.  But we are role models, and therefore we must model positive self-esteem every single day.  If this is what we want for our children, we must first obtain it for ourselves.

Even when you think they are not watching… they are!  They are looking, and listening and absorbing us like little sponges.  They are imitating our thoughts, and actions, the good and the bad.  Say nothing, do nothing, and still they are absorbing the energy that we are vibrating out into the universe.  They are learning from us how they should feel about themselves, by the way we feel about ourselves. What you see when you look in the mirror is what they learn to see when they look in the mirror.  When we place importance on make up, clothes, jewellery, purses, ties, bags, cars, money, or the weight on the scales, they place importance on those things too. 

The saying ‘Children have a mind of their own’ Should really say ‘Children have a soul of their own, and a mind like their parents’. 

‘Today I am realising that the power to changing my children lies within the power I have to change myself’.  

Raising Our Girls To Love Their Bodies

body image

I want my daughter to have a love and appreciation for her body that I didn’t have for mine when I was her age.

When I think about how much hate and disgust I felt for my body when I was growing up, I want to go back in time and shake myself.

I want to say ‘Jamie, you are beautiful, your body is beautiful, and one day this incredible body of yours is going to create two new lives, so don’t ever take it for granted. Ever. Love yourself, because one day you will have a little girl looking up at you, learning from you what a healthy body image looks like, and you won’t want to let her down’.

Well here I am in my 30’s with a little girl looking up at me, with the same blue eyes I had when I was her age, and she’s watching how I treat myself.

It’s been a journey, and it still continues, but I’m healing, and becoming the empowered role model I want her to have.  It is only in the past year that I have discovered what it feels like to accept my body for what it is. Not just accept it, but treasure it, and care for it because of everything it has done for me, and continues to do for me.  

I have had to say sorry for all those past hurts, and there was plenty of hurt. It’s not often we say sorry to ourselves, but if you have a little someone watching you too, I don’t think you should wait another minute.

If you want your daughter to love her body, then you have to love your body first. You have to say sorry to yourself for all the names you called yourself, for crash dieting, for hiding, for hurting yourself, for binging, for purging, for starving, for not looking in the mirror every single day and seeing the beauty in yourself.

I never want my daughter to think she is fat, to hide herself away, to avoid the camera, to thinks she is ugly or to look into the mirror and hate what she sees. I don’t want her to stave herself, or hurt her body to make it different, I don’t want her self worth to be based on what other people think of her.  

I’ve learned to look after myself, because this is part of loving myself….

I now eat because I want to fuel and nourish my body. I eat foods that are healthy and life giving. I don’t eat for comfort, or to fill a void. I never avoid eating something because it may make me fat, I avoid it because it may make me feel tired, slow or sluggish. I don’t exercise to lose weight, I exercise because it make my mind and body feel good.

If your journey to self love and acceptance hasn’t begun yet, I urge you to start today

– simply start with this.

‘I am sorry, I am sorry, I am sorry, and from this day forward I promise to show my body the love it deserves’ 

Launching Soon! Sky High Self-Esteem eBook

Launching 1st December! I’m working on an uplifting new book

‘Sky High Self-Esteem’.

Our children are complex, creative and inspiring individuals, who are here on this earth with us to discover their gifts, and share them with the world.  This is what empowers children to stand tall, go for what they believe in and ultimately have a positive impact on the world.  This is an awakened guide that will empower our children to look within themselves for the answers they seek, disconnect from the voice of the ego and reconnect with the soul.  

It is our job as parents to make sure our children have everything they need to face the challenges growing up involves.  I have written this holistic guidebook for all parents and teachers who want to give children the absolute best start in life, no matter how old your child is they will benefit from the insights I share.  I am so looking forward to sharing it with you soon. 

Jamie x