We were born to experience everything life has to offer us.
We were born to grow, expand, adventure and thrive.
Are you doing any of these things?
Are you growing?
When was the last time you actually did something for you? When was the last time you decided what you would do in a day?
If you can’t remember, if it’s been so long then you may be feeling the full effects of a stifled soul.
The soul is expansive and yearns for freedom. It doesn’t do well when it doesn’t get to explore or create or grow.
We are spiritual beings having a human experience.
The soul sends us messages each and every day in the form of whispers, niggles, and nudges. It’s telling us what it is that we need to be, do and have in order to grow. Often these things are experiences that push us out of our comfort zone, BUT they are essential to our soul’s growth.
The meaning of life is to grow. When we stop growing we become sad, frustrated, depressed, anxious and can even be diagnosed with a mental illness.
Worldwide, mental illness affects one in every 4 people. People aren’t happy when they are doing things that make them unhappy. The Washington Post reported that only 13% of people are happy in their job. That’s 87% of people feeling unhappy and stifled in their job. The report said people were ‘disengaged’ or had actively ‘checked out’. There is only one reason why people ‘check out’ and that’s because of boredom. They just aren’t interested in the job, it doesn’t fill them up, it doesn’t allow them to be creative, or to doesn’t use their imagination.
If it’s boring it’s not their soul’s purpose while here on earth.
Of course, not being happy where you are and with what you do each day is going to lead to sadness, and eventually to depression. The soul does not like to be suppressed, it affects our entire physical, mental, emotional and spiritual wellness. A stifled soul can cause mental illnesses such as depression, emotional issues such as sadness, crying, anger and mental issues such as worry, anxiety, and a deep sadness.
If this is you, know this: This is not your natural state, and you are NOT meant to feel this way.
How are you meant to feel?
When the soul is able to create, expand, learn, and explore, WE GROW.
We grow as a whole being and it feels incredible.
You are meant to feel content, joyful, and happy most of the time, and at other times you are meant to feel challenged. Challenges are essential to our growth and they don’t always feel comfortable. But challenges are necessary to allow us to shift out of one experience and into the next. Like the lobster who sheds his shell under a rock when he outgrows it. At first his entire being feels uncomfortable, so he leaves this comfort zone and sheds the shell and grows a new one. Be like the lobster, and leave a situation behind you once you have outgrown it!
If you are miserable at work, if your relationship isn’t working, if your friend makes you not want to pick up the phone, then maybe its time for a change. This is your challenge, this is the soul calling you to do something different.
If you don’t take control over your life and decide what you REALLY want to do, be and have then the world decides for you.
That’s how you end up somewhere you don’t want to be. You have to be the one who takes back the power and DECIDES what you really want.
Once you know, and you already DO know deep down, WRITE IT DOWN. Make it into a goal and start to make small changes so that every day you are moving closer and closer to a place that will allow you to stop feeling stifled and start feeling free.
What will you do today to allow yourself to grow?
P.S I mentioned how we need to be like the lobster and shed our old shell. Here is a great way to see how feelings of stress and challenges are forcing us to grow.
How to respond to stress:
Are you missing important messages from your soul?
There are messages of wisdom waiting for you that can help you know the next step to take in life, what decision to make, and may even have the power to change your life.
First though, you have to create an environment where these messages can actually be heard.
If you are feeling sad, angry, frustrated, depressed and you don’t know why, then maybe you need to make time to hear the messages that have been waiting for you. There is a reason behind every emotion.
Why can’t I hear these messages already?
We live in a hurried, fast-paced society, where sitting still and having quiet moments to ourselves is fast becoming a thing of the past. We fill our quiet moments with food, tv, social media, small talk, apps, and gaming. It is in the quietness and in the stillness that the messages from the soul speak to us.
It is rare to even see someone standing in line at the post office who isn’t filling the quiet moments with their phone, playing a game or scrolling social media. People waiting for the bus used to have time to process thoughts and receive intuitive messages from within them, now they are glued to their phones and the messages go unheard.
Inner wisdom from the soul isn’t loud, the soul doesn’t yell at us, or stop us in our tracks, in fact, it gently whispers and niggles at us, but too often we miss the messages because we are too busy being busy.
Life is chaotic right? You are woken by an alarm clock, you hurry out the door, you have children to care for, jobs to get to and responsibilities and roles to fulfill. By the time you get into bed at night, you are too exhausted to hear anything but the voice of the ego telling you what you did wrong that day, or telling you what could go wrong tomorrow and so on.
Worry and fear only come from the ego, and happiness, joy, and peace come from the soul.
By disconnecting from the ego and connecting with the soul we can bring in the wisdom on a higher knowing, and create a life that fills us up.
Are you making time for the messages? Even when we collapse into bed exhausted we still drown out any whisperings with social media, tv or video games.
To hear the messages of wisdom you have to create an environment where you can hear them. The ideal environment is one of quiet, one of stillness and one of calm.
Make time just for you each day at around the same time, so that it becomes part of your routine. It can be life changing to start to get these messages and be able to make the changes in your life that bring you onto the path of happiness and joy.
Try this: Get up 15 minutes before you usually do, light a candle or go for a walk, no phone, no music, and just listen to the messages that start to bubble up.
Or during your lunch break get outdoors and go for a walk, or go and sit in your car away from the noise and artificial lighting. Listen to what’s bubbling up and write down what you hear and feel, even if it doesn’t seem like it makes sense. It soon will you just may need to practice this for a little while longer to collect all the messages.
What will you do today to create the right environment so you can receive your messages?
“Be the change you wish to see in the world.” Mahatma Gandhi
I have discovered something that really changed me as a parent.
It turns out that what you see in your child is also what is inside of you.
Maybe it is something you have buried deep, or perhaps it’s right there on the surface, but either way, if you see it in your child, it is because it is part of who you too.
When I first heard this idea, it took me a little time to realise the truth for what it was. I thought ‘Oh no, don’t you go blaming me for my child’s potty mouth, or low self-worth.
I’m always telling my children not to use bad language, and to believe in themselves, so it can’t possibly be my fault when they display these behaviours. Well I was right it wasn’t my fault, and that’s something as parents we need to stop doing. No more blaming ourselves for our children’s behaviours. But it is something we need to realise in order to make a change within our children, we need to make a change within ourselves first.
If I had been handed a magical guidebook for how to raise my children when they were born, it would have told me this very critical piece of information.
Life is a mirror.
Our children mirror back to us what we are. So before we go diving into changing our child’s behaviour we may as well just make ourselves a cup of tea, and sit down on the couch for a while and look within ourselves.
Remember we are not blaming ourselves, we are all a little flawed, no one’s perfect, and we are here on this earth to learn, and to extend ourselves.
Our children actually help us through this process and help bring to light those things we thought we had buried for good years ago.
After I heard this, I began to see it every day in my family, in both good ways and in ways that challenged me to the core.
Even the things that I thought I had ‘gotten over,’ or covered over so very deeply that they were now in a place I can only describe as ‘no man’s land’ were being waved in front of me on a daily basis. I guess I had been a little blind, as I had been on a journey to change my children, and change their behaviours to meet my expectations.
It really was getting me nowhere fast and was using my energy, and patience up faster than I could muster it.
I soon realized I needed to work on myself.
So I took a break from being a reactive parent to simply observing what I was seeing and hearing.
This is what I saw…
The same loving heart that I witnessed in my children was the loving heart I have. The times when I saw my daughter pick up an insect and put it on the grass so it wouldn’t get stepped on, was the empathy and compassion for the world that was in me as well. When I was sad and full of self-doubt, and my son patted me on the back and said ‘Mum, you are amazing, never doubt yourself, everything going to be O.K.” was the same love and understanding that was in me. When my daughter cried, “No one loves me, I’m all alone”. I knew that feeling too.
And when my son yelled, “Everyone is against me, I can’t do anything right, life isn’t fair!” I knew that one well too.
Once I opened my eyes, and just began to observe my family, how clearly I could now see the truth reflected in the mirror.
My son upset one day, said, “Mum, I don’t think I am meant to be here with this family. I think there was a mistake, and I got born, but there isn’t actually a place for me here”. Now I could have spent the next few weeks working on allowing my son to feel he has a place in our family by loving him more, praising him more and so on, but I knew I already did all of that every day. I also knew where I had heard this before. I said the exact same thing to my mum many years ago. I felt the same thing as he felt right then.
I thought I had gotten over it, not having a place within my family, but I had actually buried that feeling of not being enough, down deep within myself. And now here it was looking me in the face. In fact, it’s a belief I have carried for many years, a feeling of not being able to fit in anywhere, because I think and feel differently to other people.
I remember growing up thinking God had made a mistake when I was born, he was having an off day and placed me somewhere where I had no place value. It led to a life of suffering and to me almost not being here to write these words today.
I worked on some of it over the years and obviously buried the rest. But when it’s looking me right in the face disguised as my 10-year-old son, there is no more hiding it.
What I couldn’t do for myself all those years ago, I now had to do for my son.
I had to let go of that feeling I wasn’t good enough and wasn’t meant for this world, and I had to see that standing there right then and there I was everything I was meant to be, in the perfect place at the perfect time. I was meant to be born, meant to go through what I went through, and I was meant for this world, just as my son is meant for this world, as you and your precious child are meant for this world.
The universe doesn’t make mistakes.
We are all born for a reason, everything that happens to us happens for a reason.
We are not mistakes, we are miracles.
Affirmation: ‘Today I take MY place in the world. The place that was meant for me and me alone. The unique path and life purpose that was created for me with love. I rise up, I stand tall, and I accept that I am meant for this world’.